Tomorrow I find out when I can return to my job. Unsettling feelings and thoughts surround me realizing this sabbatical is coming to an end. Once again, my faith is being tested as I see no way this will work out. However, I believe God has a plan for me that is bigger and better than my comprehension, and in His perfect timing, He will bring it to fruition.
Faith is easy when there is money in the bank and a house full of committed, supportive relatives. I suppose if that described my reality, I wouldn’t seek God except for nighttime prayers. As a single woman with no close relatives, no income for the past six weeks, no money in the bank, fighting debilitating clinical depression, it is my Father who gives me faith to believe. I pity nonbelievers who face similar circumstances because in the natural, this should scare the hell out of me. As a matter of fact, if I was not a Christian, this current season would drive me to the arms of God because I would have nothing to lose by ‘giving faith a try’. My prayer is for God to use my situation to bring others to Him.
I have a friend who is in a similar predicament – except she has no job to return to and is in the process of getting a divorce. About three years ago, God placed her on my heart to love her unconditionally as she makes it clear she does not believe in God, Jesus, heaven, etc. “When we die, that’s it” she tells me. A few days ago, she finally asked me how I am surviving with no income. Imagine my delight to tell her not only has God provided for me this past month, he has assured me He will take care of me (i.e. pay my bills) no matter how long this takes. I could tell she was thinking twice about the whole “faith” issue.
Just as Joseph used what was meant to harm him as good (Genesis 50:20), we can use struggles, hardships, and uncertainty to demonstrate reliance on God. We can ask Him to use our circumstances to prove beyond all doubt he lives within us. If you feel like you are having one crisis after another, seeing no end in sight, praise God for the numerous opportunities He is giving you to glorify Him! Then do just that… Glorify Him!