Sharing daily writings with close friends makes me extremely vulnerable -it’s like leaving my diary open at a party. (I do keep a personal diary –no one sees.) People (with whatever intention) want to fix my issues, give advice or critiques, etc. It’s like going on the Jerry Springer show – you are sharing your business which gives people the right to comment. Every time I hit the ‘send’ button, I anxiously wonder how my words will be received. My continual prayer is God be glorified no matter what.
Sometimes I feel like I am bragging when I share how blessed I am I – feel like I have Hanukah all year as I am always receiving unimaginable gifts. In fact, every day when I wake up, I wonder how Jesus will show himself in an undeniable way today. So I share partially because if I share the bad ‘depressing’ stuff, I need to share the joyous things as well. But mostly I share because people tell me they are blessed by witnessing my being blessed. For example, yesterday, this email from a reader/friend made my eyes watery:
This is very wonderful!! Thanks for sharing yourself this way. It’s like entering into the soul of a real believer and listening in on a conversation with God.
That is why I write. That is why I share.
I do temper who gets what, though, sending some things to only my closest friends. These things tend to be ‘all about me’ meaning I want to share because I know the recipient cares about a particular area of my life. Yesterday, I sent a few of those friends this:
Gotta share... yesterday, Amanda & I went to IKEA for me to get living room furniture. I told her in the store that I felt like God wanted me to wait since I really didn't have the money. (I still need lots of 'little' stuff - toaster, crock pot, etc.). So I only spent $20 on small things- came to work - first thing my secretary says to me this morning - her sister is selling a brand new living room set (sofa, chair) for $150!! I am sure this is the set for me - I go see it today :)
Since I did indeed get the furniture, I wanted to blog about how God rewards patience (which is truly a challenge for me) and faith in His provision. I was told I needed to register for an upcoming housewarming party, to which I objected because I don’t want gifts – I want people to see the amazing home that only God could have given me. “Okay, Shelly. Your friends are all going to give you plants then because we don’t know what you need.” I have what I need. I told myself I only have wants. As the day progressed, two different people said they wish they knew I just moved because they threw away furniture/dishes/bed frame, etc. Okay!! If you’re going to throw things away, giving it to me will let me use my finances in more productive ways. For example. if I use my money insisting I buy the things I want (toaster, crock pot, etc.) instead of accepting gifts, I steal from the money I can give to the church. I think I will go register now.
Psa. 145:15 - The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food at the proper time.
Psa. 74:21 - Do not let the oppressed retreat in disgrace; may the poor and needy praise your name.
1 Peter 2:12 - Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.
2 Timothy 1:7 - And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.