Had another scary experience yesterday…
Woke up having pressure in my chest again… called doctor, blah blah blah, she wants me (still) to go back to the cardiologist that I went to last year who I still owe $500 for telling me after 2 days of excruciating tests, “you’re fine”. I will go to the pulmonologist doc is recommending, but not the cardiologist.
So I wasn’t feeling ‘right’ at all, still I drove to Northland in the afternoon. I was having trouble breathing and Northland’s lobby is H-U-G-E! When I couldn’t get back in the Worship wing (where I was suppose to make copies), I asked the security guard to let me back, but for whatever reason, he wouldn’t. So I tried to go through the sanctuary… locked. Tried to get Steve from the bookstore… he was busy. So I walked all the way to the Welcome Center, feeling like I just ran 5 miles, where Lori asked what was wrong… “Nothing, just trouble breathing… will you call Susan and tell her I can’t get back to the Worship Wing?”, which she did. I hurried back to the door, not wanting her to leave, and now I feel like I am going to pass out. She couldn’t open the door either and asked me to get the same security guard I had dealt with earlier. Even when I explained that he wouldn’t let me in, she (not knowing what had happened) told me to get him. When I did, he wasn’t happy, said some things and would not let me back.
I lost it. This is why I should not go out when I don’t feel good. I started yelling at him across the church lobby, am sure the whole entire building heard me, and with my speech, I know everyone knew it was ME! Now I am embarrassed, then I didn’t care, I just wanted to breathe. Finally, Susan (who doesn’t know me that well) got the door opened and I apologized for causing a scene, explaining I don’t feel good.
When it was time for me to go home, I sat in my car for awhile, called Bryn, and told her I wouldn’t be going to Bible study because I didn’t feel good. She suggested I get someone from Northland to drive me home, but I promised I would pull over if I felt like I was going to pass out. I made it home, but became disoriented twice – did not know where I was…. Very scary.
I don’t know what is happening. I’m afraid I’ll end up having a black out or heart attack somewhere. There is something wrong. I tried to watch Grey’s Anatomy but could not process the words! Was so weird! I had to turn on the closed captioning to read what they were saying since I had trouble with auditory processing.
Maybe I should attach a GPS tracking system to my ankle so people can track me… I would make for a very interesting thesis project!