Monday, September 22, 2008
More Blessings from Less Pride
I went back to the beach yesterday. This time, Amanda went with me and it was much more relaxing. I didn’t worry about walking in the sand, or having trouble standing up since she was there to help me. I’ve always preferred to go to the beach by myself so I could ‘be introspective and introverted’ – the ocean still fascinates me, how there is a whole ‘nother world out there... dolphins galore, and sandpipers are my favorite birds: so determined, focused, not to mention cute!
Even with Amanda there, I was able to be introspective and introverted. Again, I was relaxed and didn’t feel like I had to run my words through a filter, draining my energy. I told her about my working 5 years at the Osceola County Courthouse, my complete lack of history knowledge (to which she added geography when I thought the straight trip from Cocoa Beach would lead to Africa), and other things she was surprised to learn. It was a wonderful day.
Which leads me back to cerebral palsy (work with me here). If it wasn’t for my difficulty walking/standing on sand, I would continue to stubbornly go to the beach alone. My increased limitations are becoming blessings as they cause me to reach out to others, something my pride would prevent me from doing otherwise.
One last example… Saturday evening it was raining so hard I took off my pumps and wore flip flops (which are hard to walk in) to church (not planning to stay). I ended up staying for a few hours, until I was physically tired from a long day. Since I was sitting with Elaine, I asked if I could hold her arm as we walked out of the sanctuary, to which she was glad to help. It’s getting easier, asking for help… I notice more and more, I don’t care what people think when they see someone help me up steps or link someone’s arm. It’s nice not to be stubborn and refuse to leave my home for fear I may fall… and it’s nice having friend’s to help me… but I am still an introvert, just maybe not so independent!