Monday, January 18, 2010

Textbook Depression



Depression has kept me from writing recently. For close to 2 weeks, my days have been ending as early as 2pm when I go to bed and stay there until 5am the next morning. It’s an endless cycle – guilt at my lack of productivity, shame for wasting valuable time, anxiety at not having a steady income, and pure sadness.

It’s the textbook case of clinical depression:
         -Low energy
         -Isolation & avoidance
         -Anhedonia
         -Difficulty concentrating
         -Unable to finish tasks

After reviewing potential therapeutic options, I finally made an appointment with my former psychologist, Dr. L. He knows my history, and is brilliant enough to see through my manipulations. I even try to manipulate God! So there is a light at the end of the tunnel… if I can hang on until my appointment next month, I know Dr. L will be able to pull me through.

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